Should I trust AI for relationship advice?

ChatGPT for relationship advice: what it’s actually doing

A YouGov Australia survey found that nearly three in 10 Australian adults (28 per cent) say they’ve opened up or been emotionally vulnerable with a chatbot like ChatGPT at least once. This raises an important question: should you trust AI for relationship advice?

Interrelate Practice Specialist Michael Davy says AI can be used as a tool, but it shouldn’t replace your own thinking or professional support.

When you turn to ChatGPT for relationship advice, it can feel like you’re getting guidance from an informed, neutral source. But AI doesn’t think, feel or understand relationships in the way humans do.

‘AI draws from information and data and sites that it’s been exposed to,’ Michael explains. ‘It doesn’t draw from a specific expert framework or evidence base.’

Because of this, AI is particularly strong at language-based tasks. It can summarise common relationship ideas, organise information and respond in a conversational way that feels calm and supportive.

In practice, this means AI can be helpful for:

• summarising common relationship ideas
  
• helping you reword or draft messages
  
• offering general communication tips
  
• suggesting broad next steps to consider
  

Michael describes AI as being ‘designed to offer information, summaries and ways of organising ideas’. That’s why it can feel reassuring, especially when emotions are running high.

But AI can’t fully understand the lived reality behind your question, and it can’t explain why it answered the way it did. That’s an important limitation to keep in mind.

Using AI for relationship advice: where it can genuinely help

AI for relationship advice may be most helpful in the early stages of reflection. It can help slow things down, create distance from intense emotions and offer alternative ways to frame a situation.

Research supports this limited role. A 2025 review in relationship science found that people often experience AI chatbot responses as supportive and empathic, particularly when they’re seeking reassurance or advice. However, the same research stresses that AI works best as a reflection tool, not as a substitute for real relationships or professional care.

Michael says AI can also help people step out of rigid thinking patterns.

‘We often get caught in narrow ways of thinking and run a particular story in our head about what’s happening,’ he says. ‘AI can help provide broader relationship frameworks that allow people to think more widely.’

3 practical ways AI may help 

In everyday situations, AI can be most helpful as a tool for reflection and preparation.

Sorting your thoughts before you speak

If your mind is racing, AI can help you organise what’s going on: what happened, how you felt, what you need and what you want to ask for.

Drafting a message that lands well

AI is strong with language. It can help you work out how to say something difficult in a caring tone that’s less likely to escalate conflict.

Getting a broader perspective

When you’re stuck in one interpretation, AI may offer a different lens. This can help loosen rigid thinking and open up new possibilities for understanding a situation.

 

Can ChatGPT give relationship advice safely in complex situations?

Sometimes. But it can also miss what matters most. Michael is clear that AI cannot fully understand the realities of a specific relationship.

‘AI is just a machine,’ he says. ‘It can’t read a person’s emotions or body language, and it doesn’t necessarily notice power dynamics.’

Because AI usually receives information from only one person, it may reinforce that perspective rather than challenge it. Research on the risks of AI chatbot advice also warns that chatbots can unintentionally validate unhelpful assumptions or behaviours because they don’t negotiate, push back or notice what’s missing from the story.

Michael also cautions that AI responses can sound more confident than they deserve to.

‘It often speaks in very direct ways that sound authoritative,’ he says. ‘That can lead people to assume the advice must be right, even when it’s incomplete or skewed.’

AI is not appropriate as a primary support in situations involving abuse, domestic violence or safety concerns.

‘AI is not equipped to address situations involving control, fear or harm,’ Michael says.

If you ever feel afraid of your partner, controlled, isolated, monitored or threatened, prioritise safety and seek professional human support.

Is ChatGPT good for relationship advice compared to counselling?

People often ask: is ChatGPT good for relationship advice compared to seeing a professional? Michael draws a clear distinction.

‘AI provides information. Counsellors provide intervention,’ he says. ‘That difference really matters.’

Relationship science research consistently shows that while AI can offer information and reassurance, it lacks the mutual responsiveness, accountability and emotional attunement that make counselling effective.

Counselling involves working with people in real time, responding to emotions as they arise and supporting change within the relationship itself.

‘A counsellor can help people notice what’s happening between them, reflect on emotional responses and navigate very delicate interactions,’ Michael says. ‘That’s not something AI can do.’

AI may suggest ideas, but counselling helps people apply those ideas in ways that are safe, responsive and tailored to their unique situation.

 

AI chatbots for relationship advice: how to use them safely 

Using AI for relationship advice can be reasonable when it’s approached as a reflection tool rather than a source of authority.

Michael encourages people to stay curious about how the advice is landing. Ask yourself:

• Is this widening my understanding, or just reinforcing my perspective?
  
• Does this support healthier, more respectful relationships?

Because AI sounds confident and neutral, it can be easy to over-trust it.

‘AI is a machine,’ Michael says. ‘It has no embodied experience of what it means to be human or in relationships, and it can’t understand a wider context than what it’s been told.’

If something doesn’t feel right, pay attention to that response.

‘Notice if you have a gut reaction that something feels off or unsafe,’ he says. ‘That’s important information.’

Even when AI refines its answers, it’s not an authority. It’s one source of information, not the source of truth.

 

When to trust AI for relationship advice, and when to seek human help

AI tools are now part of how many people think through relationship issues. They can be useful for organising thoughts, preparing conversations and gaining general insight.

But they can’t replace empathy, understanding context or professional judgement.

If you’re feeling increasingly distressed, stuck in the same conflict cycle, facing major decisions or worried about safety, don’t leave it to an algorithm.

‘At Interrelate, our counsellors are human and provide care that’s empathic and understanding,’ Michael says. ‘We help people make sense of the complexities of their unique situation and support healthier ways of relating.’

If you’d like personalised support, explore Interrelate’s counselling and relationship services or speak with our team about the right next step for you.

Find the right support today.